Ok I’m back again, after a brief interruption for a bit of a busy weekend! Friday I headed off to a rather swanky health spa type place for a day of pampering courtesy of a friend’s hen party (which someone else has blogged about in more detail, so I’ll leave it at that). A good time was had by all, much relaxing and gossiping was indulged in, and much tea (and wine) consumed. And the body massage was out of this world.. Saturday was pretty much a bit of random wanderings, and then making our way home. The weather was stunning, and the only thing that spoiled it slightly was we were in a car and not on top of the hills enjoying it. Ho hum.

The rest of Saturday afternoon once I got home was spent preparing for Sunday morning, which was my next service I had been booked in for, though not entirely legitimately if you stick to all the rules about these things. I had some helpers, and lots of people being supportive and so on, but this was still the most I’d done on my own before, and without the support of someone who knows what they’re doing all the way.. :S All in all I think it went ok. I had positive feedback, and the only things to work on I know are down to nerves and stuff, which only time will improve. In general, absolutely terrifying, but also a feeling of quiet satisfaction that I managed to get through it in one piece.

Ooh, and we booked a holiday :D:D Not sure its entirely sensible to be spending while hoping we’ll have more income by then, or even enough holidays. But this is necessary time together, and visiting my parents who are in bonnie Scotland at the moment, Glasgow to be precise. So there, its done. And we’re going on holiday

Today, I’m not sure. Erm, I managed to not kill my employer when he rang me at 9 this morning asking if I knew I was meant to be in work. Err, no I didn’t, you’d have to tell me for me to know.. Sigh. Back to it tomorrow.

Things still aren’t great, it might be my state of mind right now but it feels like most things are just really not working. But the point of me doing this is precisely for the times when I feel like this (though its not usually this bad, so therefore not usually this hard). So I’m trying.

Yesterday I took a bus out to Clydach, a part of Swansea I’ve never visited properly before, just heard of it, been aware of its existance on the map and so on. I went to meet my mentor to discuss preaching stuff, but its more like sitting down and talking to a friend than a heavy discussion. We had tea, chatted about how its going (general feeling; pretty well, no problems), worked out the next dates we’re doing (not for a while yet, so thats one less thing to worry about after this Sunday) and then went for a walk. The weather was sunny and… *warm*, in February, in Wales. It’ll probably be grey and rainy again soon, but while it lasts.. It was nice, just for a short time, to be up above the world a little, to look down at it, and brought back the withdrawl symptoms of not having been up a decent hill in a while.

Everything isn’t fixed, buy a long stretch. I’m still here with job applications and everything else to do. But still, I spose finding the positives is all about those little moments which come in the middle of everything else.

Apologies, the positive thinking has temporarily been disconnected from this corner of the wibsite. It is hoped that normal service will resume soon.

I think today I’m allowed to be slightly lacking in positive thinking and things of that sort. I returned to work today to learn that the threatened ’staff schedule restructuring’ (or whatever silly official name they’ve given it) has or will be implemented asap. In big business speak this is improving the company’s income by maximising the effectiveness of staff hours. They’ve even got a snappy slogan for it.

In normal person speak, it means they’re making people work certain shifts on certain days, to reflect the times when most money is taken. Oh yes, and cutting people’s hours. Essentially, whatever your contract did say, forget it. Its worthless cos we’re allowed to do this, cos we’re in such a bad way the rules don’t apply.

The end result? I get 3 hours cut from my contract, have to work 3 days with no break cos I’m working a shorter shift, and if I don’t like it, I know where the door is. There are words, but I shouldn’t repeat them here.

So, the last few days I’ve not done so well on this blogging positive thing. Although, the argument could (and will) be made that this is because I’ve been so busy being and doing positive things. Which is a good thing surely?

The last few days I’ve been, at various times;
*not in work, therefore freeeeeeeee in many ways
*travelling about the country again from home to brizzle to up norf
*celebrating a friends birthday
*listening to, thinking and chatting about interesting services and getting inspired for this whole LP thing
*spending quality time with the ‘other man’ (which I don’t think he likes being referred to as.. oops!)
*grinning rather a lot, due to the above, though mostly the last one.

Right, I think thats enough to cover three days worth. Now I have to go cos we’re going to go see a film. Oooh more positiveness. Wonder if I can keep this up once real life resumes?!

Starting as I mean to go on, whats happened today since I blogged this morning?

Well I had a good and fairly relaxed day in work, despite Big Changes which may or may not mean Bad Things coming our way- we’ll deal with them and kick up a fuss as and when its necessary. But, on the positive side, I managed to (with the help of a helpful collegue) get the day off next week that I usually have off (cos of using a holiday for another day I booked) which means that a) I get to use up more holidays which is necessary and b) I get the day free for LP type stuff, to (hopefully) meet up with my mentor and Discuss Stuff. So there. How’s about that?

And I know this might be positivity in advance.. but this weekend I’m off Up Norf to fair (!) Sheffield for a weekend. But I’ll come back with that one.

Ok, so I think ee beat me to it in the ‘this is a lenten blog’ stakes. But still, I shan’t let that put me off I was thinking about wanting to challenge myself this lent, and do something that would both help me to grow as a person, and also maybe help those around me.

Recently, I’ve been less positive than usual, if I’m honest. The job situation gets me down, more than I usually let on. There are *lots* of good things going on in my life as well, and when I remember and notice these, I feel better, lift myself out of it and carry on with renewed enthusiasm. So, this lent, I’ve decided to be positive. To make myself focus on one or two things each day that have been good. A kind of ‘count your blessings’ blog if you like. I know that when I’m feeling ok this will be easy, but harder when something gets me down. I hope that by concentrating on the good stuff, I’ll be reminded of the ways in which life is good right now, and of God’s presence with me through it all. And I might even be easier to cope with for those who take the force of my more negative moments..

So, starting in that vein, yesterday I had a day of work (no, thats not the positive!). I had a good chat over coffee about the start of my studies for the Local Preaching course, which was exciting and not too scary! I spent a pleasant half hour having my hair played with as part of my bridesmaids duties for a certain bride and in doing so managed to have a nice chat with said bride, and see my Godson who is more and more like a littler person everyday- the things I never noticed when I lived under the same roof suddenly amaze me each time Oh, and then the other man in my life came all the way over from Brizzle in the evening, bringing me some choccies from home as well as his lovely self, which was very grin-worthy after 3 weeks apart

There, how’s that for a start? I’ll see what today brings, and be back later.