I had an interesting conversation with a taxi driver this week. I say conversation, he didn’t really require much response, and I couldn’t really hear most of what he was saying. I realised at one point quite how much of a blessing this was. Having shared the story of his last fare- a couple who he had possibly managed to cause an argument between by suggesting that a magazine found in the back seat (which he showed me, complete with scantily clad woman on the cover) might have been theirs, he went on to explain to me the difference between men and women. For which I was understandably grateful.

Driver: “You know why men can navigate much better than women?”
Me (trying to not burst out into feminist-rant mode, and also rather intrigued): non-committal mumble
Driver: “Well its because when they finish school they just spend a lot of time in pubs…”
Me: thinking he might have a point there
Driver: “…and because they go round town from one pub to another they have to be able to find them all so they need to be able to navigate from one to the next.”
Me: another non-committal mumble as I start to realise that he’s actually not joking.

The best bit came next;

Driver: “and women don’t do that you see, cos they don’t go drinking in lots of pubs”
Me: wondering if he’s making a point about women not being drunken yobs, or being more discerning..
Driver (bursting my bubble): “women just go shopping, and all the shops are together in the middle of town, so they don’t need to be able to find their way around. And that’s why men are better at navigating than women.”

Unfortunately I was at the time too shattered to unleash the feminist wrath from within. And also too shocked for words.

This was then followed with a tale of woe which consisted of the result of many pubs closing, which is that men are losing this uncanny ability, or not learning it to start with, and are therefore forced to rely on sat-navs. The end result being that soon they will be “as bad as women”.

Priceless. The taxi I took back the day after wasn’t nearly so entertaining.

3 thoughts on “Navigation

  1. Ah c’mon, be fair to the poor deluded dude, he got one thing right: practice makes perfect.

    Shame the rest of his thesis was pure unreconstructed bunkum. Funny bunkum though.

  2. Teeeeeheeeheee! 😀

    Welcome to 2010. The year when discerning beer drinkers shall purchase sat-navs and an ‘app for the i-phone’ will reveal the best pints in the area.
    This decade shall also herald the society that can’t read maps and men that fail to find their way from the fashion section of their favourite high-street retailer!

    I’m glad I grew up when I did!

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